How to Overcome Rejection

Great scholars likened rejection, to the greatest fear in human beings. People face rejection in various forms as they travail through the paths of life. Today I’ll be writing about how you can overcome rejection.

The failures we face in life represent different forms of rejection, no matter how huge or subtle they manifest. Perfecting the skills of managing rejection will keep your emotions in check and make life more meaningful despite its daunting odds.

Amidst other forms of rejection people face; rejection in love is amongst the commonest form we face out there. Personally, I’ve experienced this a couple of times and I almost lost my self-esteem until II got in contact with some of the rules am going to share here with you that helped me heal and able to heal others.

Rejection in relationships and love is one of the worst places anyone prays for rejection. Most times we find ourselves wanting those who don’t really want us and when we finally muster the courage to tell them and we’re turned down; it will seem as though one is not good enough to get what really matters alone. This thought alone can keep you blue for days and even weeks. Some have even commited suicide because of rejection. How about walking up to that beautiful lady on the street that gives you goose pimples to say all the beautiful things you can  think of to convince her but you get a capital NO.

See also: How to move on after a heart break 

You may have heard of the guy who bought wonderful gifts and beehive of rented crowd including friends and family members and knelt down to propose to this wonder woman  whom their heart beats and unfortunately got what looks worse than a no. We’ve even heard of cases that earned the guy a dirty slap. Not forgetting the embarrassment and diminished ego that follows.

The irony of life is that people tends to love and want whatsoever that rejects them even more and end up getting hurt more. This rejection can burn out all the passion in you and some even manifest with what psychiatrists call anhedonia.

See also: How to find happiness in life

Amongst all these negative feelings, if you persist and man up to recovery you will see yourself lively again and positivity will start creeping in. 

This was my own story, I got involved with a high school crush that drained me academically, and the more I try, the more I see myself losing out and the said lady was becoming so powerful that should control all that happened in my life from the comfort of her heart. This continued till the lion in me woke up and I even got lucky with people whose shoes she can't fit into.

So you see you’re not alone in this battle. Also, know it's not peculiar to gender and race. Both males and females, black and whites go through rejection at different stages in life and that’s why we all need to learn and practice how to overcome it.

This isn’t funny at all, this can even make one take a decision to drop anything dating. The hurt is like sticking a needle straight into your heart. The truth is rejection is what you get when you lie to yourself that you must get everything you want for example in career, life, and love.  This mindset will definitely make you face rejections and their consequences when you’re faced with unmet needs.


1. Rejection has nothing to do with self-worth

Most people who get rejected feel bad because of that feeling of not being worth what they don’t get. They feel they’re not good enough for what doesn’t come to them when they try. This is totally wrong as this line of things exacerbates energy and depletes your self-worth. 

This is not supposed to be. Getting rejected doesn’t make you a worse person than you are, and neither does it mean you’re not good enough. Just know no matter how you are or the circumstances, you’re good enough for someone. 

Rather than draining your self-worth think of it in the light that what you cant get is not what you're having it. This is simply because you don’t lose anything by not dating your dream girl rather she lost someone that would have showered her with love that knows no end. So it's his or her loss, not yours.

2. The person rejecting is also facing some forms of  rejection:

Remember that saying “Hurting people hurt others”. This is the whole truth, anyone hurting you is only reflecting what they are experiencing in their inner self. Some folks believe if they can't have what they want in life then others who want them can also have them. 

When you remember that this person who is playing god in your life is also facing rejection somehow somewhere, you’ll learn to accept rejection in good fate. Rejection doesn’t reflect who you are but rather people's priority at the moment. Someone can reject you for not being muscular because at that stage of life being muscular is among their must-haves on a date. 

3. Rejection takes you closer to what you want:

Sometimes we settle for less and get rejected, this makes us strive for something bigger. You discover yourself leaving the realm of mediocrity and achieving the unthinkable if you see yourself aiming higher each time you are faced with rejection. 

Remember the story of Abraham Lincoln when faced with failure at a particular stage and level, he came back next time fighting for something bigger and this earned him the office of the president of America.

4. The best is yet to come:

5. Along the journey of life, your purported destination may be just the beginning of your journey. 

Life always has something better to offer if we’re persistent on what we want. Getting rejected should make you put off dating or achieving your career for life but rather should spur you to wait for the best which is yet to come. 

The best things are kept for those who patiently wait. Remember what happened at that wedding where Jesus was in attendance where after the miracle of turning water into wine the dignitaries who tasted it, said they had kept the best wine for the end of the ceremony. 

If you take your own life now for being rejected, you’ll not be alive to see the same you making choices from many out there and also rejecting others. If you can get a throwback picture of any popular musician or artiste you’ll see that most of them don’t even look like those people will be breaking heads to be in their lives but as usual, time changes things. Time can also change your own story if only you believe.

See also: Best way to start your day

What you can do

 1. Re-channel your passion:

Rather than spending all your energy and passion on what you ought to have go in search of other passions. This will help you heal from rejection and quickly fix your broken heart. If you're busy with other passions you may end up forgetting such rejection even exists. 

Don’t allow worries of the unseen to occupy your moments of excellence. Don’t cloud your existence with what is obvious can never happen. Ignoring a particular passion can even pull them in your direction without knowing. Just determine to be the best person you can be.

 2. Learn something new:

A new skill, hobby, or task could be all that is needed to help you overcome rejection. The essence is to invest your time in other things such that you forget that whatsoever is rejecting you even exists.

 3. Tour places:

Go on a tour, and visit some attractive places, tourism can help you forget any aching part of your life. You can also catch your dream princess or prince on one of those pleasure trips. This is why developed countries invest so much in boosting tourism because of many of its benefits. Instead of soaking your bedsheets with tears and whisking away your life from rejection; brace up, go out there and pull back the pieces of your life together.

4. Make new friends

Meet new people, make new friends, am sure you will meet people far better than your crush. You find better engagement than bothering yourself with whom you can have. Have some breath of fresh air in your life. Open up to new things and you could be me today teaching others how to overcome rejection. 

People are only as good as you place them in your heart. By the time you exalt someone else to that same status or even higher than the one rejecting you, you will find yourself totally free from rejection.

5. See a counselor:

If all the above fails, you can see a professional counselor, their job is to talk some sense into you. They can realign your life in the right direction if you are willing to make amends.


6. Self Hypnosis:

This will help you access the unconscious realm and model your life how it should be; devoid of rejection and every negative feeling. This can help you overcome the trauma of unrequited love. You will find yourself thinking less of this person and becoming a better person.

See also: How to heal from self guilt 

7. Nobody is irreplaceable

I will end with this, never forget this golden rule, no matter how important anyone may be to your life or to your dreams they can be replaced with even better options. Always open up your heart for options rather than languish in rejection.


It is my desire that you will overcome rejection and become a better person, I also hope that the above outline points will help you in the quest for self-improvement. It is my earnest desire to see you live life again in vigor and master the art and science of how to overcome rejection.


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